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Nominative Determinism? Well it's Sunday Readers, so You be the Judge

September 30, 2018

Consider these freaky facts:

 

The newly elected president of The American College of Cardiology? Why, it's Doctor Michael Valentine. Could he have a better name?

 

Perhaps you've heard of the beloved allergy specialist, Doctor Aikenhead?

 

Or maybe this educated lab coat lady crossed your computer screen:

 

But . . . but, we're guessing you might have missed this degreed fellow:

 

So with these lab coat libertines in mind, get a load of this headlining stethoscope scallywag:

 

in Decatur Illinois Municipal Court last Friday, an appropriately named medical maniac dubbed Doctor Michael Dick was found guilty of sexually harassing 3 of his adult patients.

 

Yes, indeed.

 

We could make this stuff up. but with thousands of physicians continuing to socially poop in their surgiscrubs day after day,  why on earth would we have to?

 

Yes, another doctor - this one named Dick - allowed his pee-pee to get him into trouble, and now has been sent off for a whopping 30- day jail stint, and ordered to pay a $1500 fine for his harassment charges. 

 

One of his victims told investigators the MD had pulled her panties down and started touching her for no medical reason. Another woman reported Daffy Dick put his hand down her slacks and touched her vagina, again, for no medical purpose,

 

According to TV news reports, at least 10 other women are suing the doc named Dick in civil court, and nearly a dozen more are considering it. 

 

His punishment? 4 weeks in jail and a fine. Cuz' that's how we babysit misbehaving MDs in 2018.

 

Ever notice how American jurisprudence holds doctors to the lowest tiers of discipline in society? Wouldn't you think, what with their birth-names so weirdly and accurately announcing to the world their future behavior - we oughta know better?

 

We notice it . . . every damned day of the week.

 

 

 

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