Doctors Taking Poetic License? Oh, Yeah. And It’s 100% Legal! Enjoy!

Occasionally we think it appropriate to tip our cap to the thousands upon thousands of physicians in our nation who aren’t the least bit criminal. In fact, some of these guys and gals have figured ways to be downright upright, without committing any crime at all. They treat their patients with respect; save a few lives and – in their downtime – actually deem to entertain us with some mighty fine poetry. And God love them. Enjoy these scribblings of stethoscope scriveners.

Off to the Annual Convention

Oh, we’re off to a medical meeting

Where there’s never a problem with seating

Except in the bar

Where friends from afar

Are exchanging their annual greeting

Since the IRS didn’t complain

When we held our convention in Spain

We’ll talk antibiotic

In someplace exotic

And not in Des Moines or Fort Wayne

If the lectures get too soporific

We’ll steal off to watch the Pacific

And we’ll toss down a few

Tax deductible too!

In a toast to la vie scientifique

So what if we do run up bills?

For dinner with all of the frills

A fine bill of fare

Will help us prepare

To “improve our professional skills”

So we’re off to the annual convention

Eager to turn our attention

To the holy alliance

Of pleasure and science

And sundries we don’t need to mention

(David Goldblatt, MD, University of Rochester)

Ode to Room 459

They test your blood by pints and quarts

They fill you up with barium

And watch your blushing innards flip

Like fish in an aquarium

They puncture you like needlepoint

They steal your clothes and drag you

From whatsiscope to whosiscope

They pummel, thump and gag you

For there’s a test for every ill

To help the doctor cure it

But few except the well and strong

Are able to endure it!

(Leonard Reeves MD, Gainesville, Florida)

And our favorite scribbling ever, EVER written by a doctor:

The Urinalysis

Some bring their sample in a jar

Some bring it in a pot

Some bring a sample barely ample

While others bring a lot

Some hide it in a paper bag

Some wrap it like a treasure

Some quite undaunted

Proudly flaunt it

As though it gives them pleasure

Some cork it up so tightly that

It’s quite a chore to spring it

Some let it slosh, almost awash

And some forget to bring it

(Richard Armour PhD, Miami)

Have a terrific weekend, readers, and thank you for your support in buying our books.