You know us by now. So no need to ask for even a second, if these daft doctor dramas are true:
New Jersey Doctor Stole a Dead Man's Hand to Seduce a Topless Dancer
Yes indeed, 26-year-old Doctor Ahmed Rashed confessed in 2007 in a New Jersey courtroom to stealing a hand from a cadaver at the University of Medicine and Dentistry in Newark. The hand was later found by police at the home of stripper Linda Kay, who danced at a topless nightclub called Hott 22 in the city of Union.
When the M.C. yelled "Give the naked lady a hand!" most everybody else responded by clapping. But did this idiot stick to simple applause? Nooooo.
The good news? The family of the dead man never knew what happened to their dearly beloved, because hospitals keep their wacky staff antics secret.
The bad news? Well, in keeping with the American insanity that physicians are held to the lowest standards of discipline in society, rakish Rashed was given a baby-slap on the diapered butt and allowed to continue on in his medical career.
So here's a cool thought: maybe if you're really lucky, Doctor Ahmed Rashed is YOUR physician!
Surgeon Goes Off to the Bank During an Operation
So a poor patient by the name of Charles Algeri was lying on an operating table with his spinal column splayed open one day when his surgeon decided - what the hell - "I need to go deposit my paycheck."
And you wonder why a Paramedic might become a heretic.
And so he did, He skipped down the hall and got in his car and drove away. The name of this doctor-dufus is David Arndt, and neither the surgical staff nor hospital administration should have been TOO surprised, because this particular lab coat loon had been pulling stupid stunts for years. But as you certainly ought to know by now from The Paramedic Heretic, physicians are traditionally held to the disciplinary level of bratty 5th graders. Serious punishment is rarely performed.
if you care to know more about Doctor David Arndt, you can read all about it by clicking his name. Personally, we'd be happy to never hear his name again, but that's just us.
New York Doctor Spites His Divorcing Wife by Accidentally Blowing Himself up
His name was Doctor Nicholas Bartha, a stethoscope scamp who didn't care who he hurt or who he killed. He wasn't about to let his wife win the house - an entire brick building in downtown New York - without a fight. So he sneaked in, jerry-rigged a gas line and forgot the part about escaping before the explosion. Oops.
Have a terrific weekend, readers. And remember - NEVER allow a lab coat to outrank your common sense. Doctors are not always the smartest primates in the room.